Absent minded jokes

Main Article page | Beauty articles | Health page | Computers| Diseases | Education | Entertainment | Family
Business |Fitness|  Fruits and Vegetables | Jobs | General | Personality| Technology | Tourism | Sports
Biography Page| Heroes & Incredible peoples | Inventions | Useful Tips | Stories
Jokes & Humour | funny articles

Humor is a spice that adds interest and excitement in life.  The famous comedian Charlie Chaplins once said ,  "A day without humour,  is a day wasted."

We are living in a world of stress.  Everyone is inflicted with various type of stress. Job stress, financial stress, health stress etc.  At the same time,  we have been inflicted with humorous moments too.  When you start enjoying the  humour in your life, life becomes more interesting and exciting. 

Many of you might have heard about Walt Disney famous movie “ the absentminded professor.   In this movie,  Professor Brainard (pronounced BRAY-nerd) is an absent-minded professor of physical chemistry and he makes an interesting discovery.  In the excitement of his discovery, he used to forget what is going on around him and he misses his own wedding several occasions.  If we look back in our like, we can also find some interesting and humorous incidents of  absent mindedness. Here are some of them

Sir Isaac Newton was sometimes very absentminded. One day a Dr. Stukely called at his house. A servant told Stukely that he would have to sit down and wait, for Sir Isaac was in his study and no one was allowed to disturb him there. Soon another servant brought in Newton's dinner--a boiled chicken under a cover--and sat it close to the visitor. After an hour passed and Newton still did not appear, the doctor found that he was hungry and so proceeded to eat the chicken.

Newton finally came in and apologized for having kept his visitor waiting so long. He said, "Give me but leave to take my short dinner, and I shall be at your service; I am fatigued and faint." On removing the cover to his dinner he saw only a pile of bones. Embarrassed at appearing so ridiculous before a stranger, he put back the cover and said, "See what we studious people are: I forgot I had dined."

A Filipino pilot who became well known for his absent-mindedness was invited to pilot a new flying boat. The pilot had a good time flying. After spending a couple of hours in the air, the pilot decided that it was time to land. He was about to make a landing on the ground when his assistant reminded that they were supposed to land on the sea.

"Yes, I know. I was just testing you," answered the pilot. "I am not that absent-minded." So the flying boat made a safe landing on the water. Having accomplished this, the pilot, being proud for not committing a big mistake, opened the door and stepped into the sea.

----------

Absent-minded professor - Heavens! someone stole my wallet.
Wife- Did'nt you feel a hand in your pocket?
Professor- I did, but I thought it was mine

----------

Did you hear about the absent-minded doctor who, on his wedding day, when it came to put the ring on the wife's finger, started checking the pulse rate and asked her to stick out her tongue?

----------

G. K. Chesterton was certainly one of the most absentminded of authors. Chesteron wrote the Father Brown detective stories, as well as numerous essays, novels, and biographies. He lived in London but spent most of his waking hours in the world of imagination, paying little heed to the bustling city around him. One day he went up to the ticket window of a train station and asked the agent for a cup of coffee. After recollecting himself and straightening out that bit of confusion, he proceeded into the station restaurant and ordered a ticket to Battersea

---

A barber, a bald man and an absent minded professor take a journey together. They have to camp overnight, so decide to take turns watching the luggage. When it's the barber's turn, he gets bored, so amuses himself by shaving the head of the professor. When the professor is woken up for his shift, he feels his head, and says "How stupid is that barber? He's woken up the bald man instead of me."

----------

Nurse - You've just become the father of a baby boy!
Professor - Don't tell my wife, I want to surprise her.
----------

 Did you hear about the absent-minded who stood in front of the mirror for hours together wondering where he had seen himself before.

----------

Waiter: "Sir, did you forget something?"
The absent-minded professor: "I just gave you a good tip, didn't I?"
Waiter: "Yes, you did, Sir. But you forgot to eat your lunch."

--------

The absent-minded professor was back from work with wet clothes.
His wife: "Why did you get your clothes all wet?"
"I didn't bring my umbrella."
"Why didn't you seek a shelter from the rain?"
"I wasn't aware I didn't take my umbrella until I tried to close it at my office"

--------

An absent-minded professor used to carry 3 umbrellas on his way to the college. But one day he returned home totally drenched.

On being asked how he managed to get wet in spite of all the precautions,

He replied nonchalantly, "I left one umbrella in the bus, the other in the college and I forgot to open the third."